Doctor Who Season 14 Episode 4 Review – “73 Yards” – A Depressing and Pointless Journey

As I sit here writing my Doctor Who Season 14 Episode 4 Review, I can’t help but feel a certain sense of annoyance and anger. It’s a strange feeling to have after watching a series I’ve loved for a long time, but every once in a while, I’ve had it for various series I’ve seen. It’s the feeling that I have when I believe I’ve just seen one of the worst episodes of a franchise. I’ve been with Doctor Who since the Eccelston era, and I truly believe that “73 Yards” is the worst episode of the series I’ve witnessed. In a way, that is more horrifying than the episode itself.

So, where to begin?

I guess I’ll start with a recap of the premise. In the episode, The Doctor and Ruby Sunday end up in Wales within 2024 (presumably not long after she left, though it’s one of MANY things that aren’t explained in the episode). As they’re examining a “faerie circle,” they accidentally break it. What does that do? Well, it leads to The Doctor disappearing, the TARDIS suddenly being unable to be opened by Ruby’s key, and a mysterious elderly person is now following Ruby. She appears 73 yards apart from her no matter where she goes.

That alone would be enough of a mystery for the episode. “Where is The Doctor?” “Who is this woman?” “What does Ruby have to do to get rid of them?” But instead of just following this track, the episode goes down arguably one of the most depressing rabbit holes I’ve ever expressed in television. It truly left me feeling depressed, hollow, and angry by the end of it…because none of it made sense after a while, and I knew it wouldn’t last…just like with “Boom” last week.

Basically, one of the “curses” of this mysterious woman is that anyone who dares approach her, even if they don’t talk to her, gets “bewitched” into running away and doing certain things. In the case of a stranger, he said he would never return to a place he loved to drink at. In the case of Ruby’s adopted mother, she abandoned Ruby, even filing an injunction against her to keep her away. Even our dear Kate from UNIT went from wanting to recruit her to running away in fear despite only “hearing the woman” through an earpiece.

As such, for the next 65 years of her life, Ruby is essentially alone. No Doctor, no family, no TARDIS, and no meaningful life. It’s seriously depressing, and that’s still not the end of it.

About midway through the episode, we get a “Doctor Who twist” when Ruby thinks that she needs to use her “curse” to take care of a politician who is about to plunge the planet into nuclear war. Sure enough, she gets it to work, and the politician resigns. That was thrilling…because he was truly a monster that Ruby had to endure to ensure she “was right” about this whole thing.

…except…she wasn’t right, and the person was still there despite her good deed.

Then, in the “twist ending,” we find out that the person following Ruby…was Ruby! Specifically, her elderly self on her deathbed. In her “last moments,” she warns her former self to “don’t step” on the faerie circle, thus breaking the cycle of events.

Do you want to know the problem with that…? Everything!

I’m being blunt here by noting my Doctor Who Episode 4 Review score won’t be high, like, at all. The reasons why are simple. The key thing to note here is that, again, this episode was depressing to its core, and even some of the scariest parts of Whovian history had bright spots for people to look for to understand the pain the Doctors or companions felt. “Blink, “Turn Left,” “Heaven Sent,” all were terrifying and depressing episodes, but the twists and endings made them meaningful. “73 Yards” didn’t do that, and that’s what made it frustrating.

Key among these frustrating elements was that nothing was truly explained about what Ruby endured. Where did The Doctor go after the faerie circle was broken? We don’t know! Why did the TARDIS not open for Ruby despite having the key? We don’t know! How did her “future self” get to the past to “warn” her future self?” We don’t know!! Why did “future Ruby” stay 73 yards away? We don’t know!!! If it was just “future Ruby,” why did everyone freak out after interacting with her? WE DON’T KNOW!!!!!

Because the cycle was broken, Ruby doesn’t remember any of this (which is honestly a godsend given all that happened to her), and so the episode was emphatically pointless.

Remember that “Turn Left” happened because of alien interference, and the point was to show how Donna’s choices put her on the right path in life, including saving The Doctor. It also set up the “end of the universe” thanks to Rose’s message. “Blink” had Sally Sparrow helping The Doctor stop the Weeping Angels, and she eventually was able to make big personal moves in her life after finally meeting The Doctor. In “Heaven Sent,” the torture and constant rebirths were all so he could finally make it back to Gallifrey in the end.

In “73 Yards,” we got none of that! There was no growth in Ruby’s character or something meaningful with The Doctor. Even her “deus ex machina” abilities via the snow that we saw in past episodes didn’t appear here. Why? We…don’t…KNOW!!!!

Sadly, this also harps on what I’ve been saying since Doctor Who Season 14 began: this season feels like it’s rehashing old bits to try and create something “new,” and it’s failing. This episode felt like a mix of many episodes I’ve already talked about. The hopeless/depressing nature of “Turn Left” mixed with “The Girl Who Waited” highlights what happens when a companion is left all alone in life. But again, those two had meaningful endings that built upon what happened to them. This one…didn’t.

Even the “Susan Twist” cameo is negated because of the continuity rewrite, so did it ever really happen? I don’t know, and I’m really tired of saying that.

Sure, on the whole, I kind of get what they were going for with “73 Yards.” But there’s a difference between “trying to do something” and executing it well. Doctor Who as a whole should never be this depressing without a good twist. There wasn’t much good in this episode at all.